Open minded

We are the results of the past, but even more important the imagination of the future

Four years ago, when my eldest son, who was 17 years old, asked me to allow him sign up Evolve MMA, as he needed parents' consent to join. I was very concerned.  MMA gave me impression of violence and injury...... I was so not ready to let my boys go through it.

Four year has passed now, not only my eldest son, the second son also joined to train BJJ.  Today, I, from skeptical to enthusiastic,  am the No. 1. fan of them, and perhaps No.1 BJJ mum in Singapore.

That taught me a good lesson.  We should always be open minded.

Whatever we had in the past, gives us good experiential knowledge; but what holds in future, we can only imagine.  

I received this in my mail box this morning, I thought is good to share:

"According to research done by Dr. Daniel Gilbert of Harvard, people are really bad at predicting who they will be in the future. The reason is simple: it’s far easier to remember the past than to imagine the future.

Because we don’t take the time to imagine the future, we assume that things will pretty much be the same in ten years as they are now. We even erroneously believe we will be the same person in ten years as we are right now. Gilbert and others call this The End of History Illusion, and what it means is this:

• We recognize that we’ve gone through some big changes in our past
• We see our current selves as the finished and evolved version of ourselves
• We assume that in the future, we will mostly be who we are now

If you look back on who you were ten years ago, you will likely see some differences. You were probably in a different situation. You probably had different goals. You likely had different friends and hobbies. Of course, some of what you were doing is probably still the same as ten years ago.

As people get older, they tend to change less over ten year periods of time.

From age 15 to 25, you’re going to see some big change.

From 25 to 35, you’re likely to see some big changes as well.

But from 35 to 45, the rapidity of change tends to slow down for most people"

I have been learning along side with my two sons in their journey of BJJ with watchful eyes.  I can feel their passion, their dedication and commitment in BJJ, mostly, this sport has ignited their imagination on  what they want to be in the future.  That opens a wonderful world for them.  So much potentials they can see for themselves, and automatically, so much self discipline come out all by themselves.

Not surprisingly......

Life is like a train journey, we are all living in different stages of life.

Not surprisingly, at different stage, we meet different people, see different view and get different perspectives of journey.  That is one of beatify to be alive.

Recently, I also saw one of blogs which I followed "Say Goodbye", and moved on a new part of life sharing.

I had always enjoyed her writing of her kids and educations,  I shared many of her views on those topics.  Just like I was once a "Full Time mum" and "Only a Mum", her blog was centered by her kids and schools, now as her children have all grown up, she is doing well in her professional writing business, I am so happy for her.

Nor surprisingly, that is also telling me, there is no limited on whom you can be.  

Therefore, we should take any day as precious and redeem the time and enjoy the life.

Two Months to SEA Game

Both of my sons are going to represent country in coming SEA game 2019.  I am so proud of them.

I am very encouraged by them for their hard work, dedication and commitment.  

One of most important is their mindset, they have set Gold medal as their goal.

May God bless them!

With my belief, prayer and yes, God's strengthen, they will!

Think MAD

The mind is so powerful, in fact, it has proven that a man's mind is The most important tool to decide whether he/she will be successful.

What you think , you will be. Now let's think MAD (HOW TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE)

In other words, if you think you will be great leader, one day you will be.

I am so excited to learn new things every day.  I am going to put all these learning into my practical daily life.

＊Ask Why you do what you do
*  Then know how to do
*  Do what it takes

Then
* You will be successful in any areas of life.

Schedule and Productivity

We are living in a busy world.  

From young to old, we seem to trap at endless schedule struggles.  When was the last time, do you feel have nothing waiting for you?  Lucky, if you can remember one.

For me, I have my schedules all packed till next year March, and planning for next year December.

But, why are we busy? for what are we busy?  For me, it is because of work and family commitment.  

I do enjoy mostly what I am doing.  But recently, I find myself to be more productive if I only schedule half of time that available, and leave the rest of half empty for other things.

For example, if I work half day, it seems I will be more productive than I work full day.  I think, the reason is the moment I realize that I only have half of time I used to have, I will be more focused thus, done work faster.

That leads me to think, how many of us who are working full time, are actually wasting half of our time?  What about company feels when employee actually can work as fast as half of the time?

That boils down the productivity issue, the engagement issue and motivation issue.  But if I can use half of time to do other things, to learn a new skill, to exercise, to spend time with others, I enlarge more in my career development.

But, it may not necessary work for certain types of job.  Maybe in the future, the part time employment will be a norm.

Ask, Thou should be given

Do you have experience that..... for me, it was many times experience which I gave thanks for.

Thanksgiving

-  My daughter found a job in campus to do what she loves;

-  My Helper Sharon takes good care of Moses-the-cat;

-  Stephen starts to train, wish he finds his passion and joy

Ask, not to be shy

when Noah started to train competitively for BJJ,  of course, he had less time and energy for swimming.  That did not affect him, only CCA achievement record,  he used to be awarded by school color.

After winning few national Championship and twice World Youth Jujitsu Championship in Abu Dubai, I felt that he should be awarded for his CCA achievement even in different sports, but requires the same dedication, hard work and commitment.  So I wrote to school and asked them to consider.

Thank God, "Ask, Thou shalt be Given".

When was the last time did you ask something from anyone, for anything?

Please do, 

Focus on what you want

21 days challenge:-Day 2

Thanksgiving:

- My husband agreed to cancel my daughter's non used simcard (sounds silly, right, but was big deal for me, story-worthy another time)

- New Learning ( the original approach to instagram was because all my children have one, even little 10 years old, now I discovered many inspiration from intagram lately)

"Focus on what you want."

Tom Bilyeu in his intagram shared interview with @danicapatrick, the message is powerful, "You go where you eyes go".  For the full interview, please search @tomblyeu

Here is what she said:

"You got to think what you do want, not what you don't want, So 100% you looking at wall, you are going there. Where you eyes go, just where your minds go, where you set your focus, mental attention, reference point...."

When I start to this new blog, is a new page for me, new chapter for my life.  As now I am living my life mainly for me (Thank God), I will find the The One Thing and Focus on it.

Things I plan to achieve in next three years (2019 to 2022)

• Pass JLPT N2 in 2022
• Travel 5 new countries where I have never been before
• Support my older children to reach their goals, to be biggest fan for them
• Be kind and supportive mother to my younger children who are still lacking of self control and self motivation
• Be kind and supportive wife to my husband 

The secret of Happiness

"The Happy Secret to Better Work" by Shawn Achor is such a delightful message for today's workforce.

We ought to learn the secret of Happiness. Shawn gave the simple outline on how to achieve just that:

• gratitude
• journaling
• exercise
• mediation
• random act of kindness

Sound easy? right, please do 21 days in a row, then, your brain will rewind itself, to focus on positive, instead of negative, to be happy , the performance will be better as result.

Let me put it into practice:

Day 1:

Thank God that my son got his School Full color honor and special mention award;

thank God that even it was raining, we were not late;

Thank God for simply honesty of coffee shop-man, when I could not remember whether I have paid for coffee:).

I should do the rest of them...

Learning from children

My son teaches me the real lesson of "The One Thing".

Noah started to train Ju-jutsu when he was 15 years old.  Soon, he found it to be his "The One Thing".  Never even once need I to persuade him to train.  He trains five times a week, every week.

Not only had he found his "The One Thing", he also had big vision "To be the Black Belt World Champion", such goal has been his motivation.  As the result, his skill and mental capacity has grown in leaps and bounds.

Last Sunday, we attended 3rd Singapore BJJ Open competition, Noah took part in both under 70 kg and Open categories.  He submitted all his opponents and won Gold in both catergories.

That is power of finding "The One Thing".

Find your passion

I still remembered the days when I had to drive my children for their swimming training.   Four times a week, each time for at least four hours, some times, just had to drag their feet and chase them to the pool.....

It was easier said than done, they did listen to me when they were young, as soon as they were taller than me, they made their mind clear and loud.

Same went with piano lessons, I cannot remember how many times I had to sit with them for practicing.....Though all of them were introduced by formal piano lessons at early age, only my daughter lasted to finish Grade 8.

Looking back, I just could not emphases enough the importance for parents to allow children to find their own passion. It may take time, but when they find their passion, how above troubles will never happen.

When Paul and Noah started BJJ, I was horrified by their choices of sports...... But they were determined and passionate about this sport, I slowly gave in and gave space.  Not even one time had I needed to remind them for training, instead, I was trying to persuade them not to train so much.  The self motivation, self drive in the sports won my respect.  I started to open heart to support their pursuit.  It was a big learning moment for me too.

What would I say to young parents;-

• To let your children find their own passion by exposing them widely and be open minded
• Be ready to support their choice, no matter what.